The Independent Olympic Games is in disarray this afternoon, after one of the top athletes was disqualified from the 1m digging.
When asked to clarify the situation, The Fairy said that after a show of the upmost disrespect, Monty The Great had been totally, absolutely and irrevocably disqualified for weeing on the equipment.
She went on to say that, “It is clearly stated in the rules, that none of the apparatus is to be used as a toilet. Doing so negatively impacts on other competitors, and will not be tolerated.”
Chicken, who was declared the winner by default, said that she was sad that her gold medal had been awarded under these circumstances, but that she intended to accept it anyway, boom, boom.
This is not the first controversy to hit the games. An official enquiry is underway after claims were made that a winning athlete had been judging himself.
Monty The Great was unavailable for comment.
Please note: this video contains footage of weeing.