15. Multifunctional dwelling unit – by Monty

Later today we will be visiting Big Rabbit and The Grandparents. Like most English people, The Fairy has waited until the road conditions are bad before venturing out in her car. Chicken and I love going for a variety of reasons, including the fact that there is always an abundance of food and cuddles.

The kitchen is where the food is, and I find this is the best place to lay down during the preparation period. I have never been stood on, confirming my belief that this is the safest place for me. I receive many compliments on my size whilst in this position.

The main living area is where the two large greyhound beds are located. The Grandparents and Big Rabbit prefer to be squashed together on the smaller of the two, so Chicken and I stretch out on the big one. It is only right that we display this level of respect in somebody else’s house. The Fairy sits on the floor.

I do not know how The Grandparents access their bedrooms as there are no stairs. They do have some secret rooms at the front of their house however, which we are not allowed in. In an interesting twist, Arky-Ollie-Just is quite often on the premises and spends most of his time in one of these rooms. I can therefore assume that he has been engaged by The Grandparents to carry out some kind of archaeological investigation. Interesting.

The most useful room in the entire house is the multifunctional indoor/outdoor kennel, which is part of the garden despite having walls, large windows and a door. The Grandparents use it to drink tea in; Chicken uses it to gain access to the spare greyhound bed; Big Rabbit uses it as a look-out point; I use it to relieve myself, and The Fairy uses it when she wants to apologise. I think everyone should have one of these halfway kennels so that nobody has to go into the garden during inclement weather.

The Fairy has informed me that I’m not going to embarrass her anymore at The Grandparents house. This is a little confusing, as I don’t believe that I have ever done anything embarrassing in my whole life! Apparently, she has a plan in place for today’s visit.

I do not like the way she is looking at me.


Categories: Greyhounds, Monty

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