This morning, I decided to stretch out on the settee to watch the news. This would have been a pleasant experience, had it not been for the fact that Chicken was already on it.
Chicken declared it to be her seat and I tried to remain patient with her whilst explaining that all the furniture was to be shared. She couldn’t quite understand this concept, citing the issue of the cabinet.
She went on to say that she wouldn’t agree to share her seat unless I agreed to allow the troll to live in the new cabinet. I said that the cabinet had already been formed, which she countered by stating that it hadn’t even been delivered yet, nevermind formed.
The discussion went on for quite a while, finally evolving into an almighty row. She registered her disapproval of the new cabinet; the fact that Ugly Cat would be allowed in it; the fact that Troll would not be allowed in it, and quite out of the blue – the fact that I had eaten a roll sausage in a bag without sharing.
Realising that there was no possibility of a reasonable conversation, I did the only thing that I could do under the circumstances: I stretched out to my full size, covered the whole of the settee, and ousted her.
Chicken gave up her seat, gibbering on about bringing the whole cabinet down as soon as she had the chance. I will be glad when we move into Number 10. We will have more than one seat and more than one cabinet there.