I think the full moon is having an effect on Chicken. Last night, for no reason that I could see, she bolted down the garden and threw herself onto the back fence. She then did it again a second time. I was very tempted to go and see what she was doing, but have learnt that there is nothing to gain by trying to understand her behaviour.
Yet I fear Chicken is not the only one behaving strangely at the moment. Yesterday morning I awoke early and went out into the garden. Imagine my horror when I found myself looking with disbelief at a seagull. I lie, not. A seagull! In my garden. The nerve of the thing. It took off straight away when it saw me but I cannot believe it had the audacity to land in my garden in the first place. First a garden bird, then pigeons, and now a seagull. What is going on? I’m half expecting there to be an ostrich tomorrow.
We went for a walk last night and a cat jumped out from under a bush, right in front of us. We obviously tried to grab it but as we were out with The Fairy we had attached leads to her to keep her safe, and so couldn’t run as fast as we wanted to. We dragged her along as fast as we could but lost sight of our quarry on a bend. It was only when we were close to home that The Fairy told us to look back. The cat was following us!
I say again: What is going on?
My military training is telling me that some kind of conspiracy is unfolding within my own territory. Let us not forget that I was somehow poisoned a few days ago. There is no telling what will happen next, so I must protect my unit. I hope those responsible for the illegal fracking haven’t found out that I am on to them.
I never expected retirement to be such hard work.