206. Hear Me Out – by Monty

In my line of work, it is important to think on your feet. Sometimes it is necessary to Improvise, Adapt and Overcome. This is where I excel. When the going gets tough, as they say, the tough get going. And the going is particularly tough at the moment with regards to the food situation and to Chicken’s teeth.

I have good news regarding her recovery. I accompanied her to the vets this morning for her check up. Ordinarily I wouldn’t set foot in the place, but I was there to support Chicken. I did a rather good demonstration of how one might shake if one were frightened of the vets, which everybody present found very useful. The vet was pleased with her progress so we are all very relieved. The Fairy has given both of us extra attention and has hand-fed Chicken with all sorts of nice things. I’m glad to say that I was also given some of this lovely PROPER food, in the interest of fairness.

Then it came to me. A flash of inspiration so profound that even I was stunned by my own brilliance. Improvise, adapt and overcome.

These are the facts:

  • We were put on a diet of gravel. 
  • Chicken had some teeth removed.
  • For a period of three days we were both given soft chicken, mince, black pudding and ham.

So, without even referring to the official text book, I have identified a method of obtaining good quality food for a period of at least three days: book Chicken into the vets. It’s that simple!

Hear me out.

Chicken has 26 teeth left, which in theory could mean up to 78 days of decent food if she were to have one tooth extracted at a time, and we were to get soft cooked real meat for three days after each extraction. I’m sure she will agree that that will be worth the small amount of discomfort she may feel.


Stunned by my own brilliance

I have not yet ironed out all the details, but I intend to put the idea to Chicken as soon as she stops drooling.

Monty The Great

Categories: Greyhounds, Monty | Tags: , ,

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8 thoughts on “206. Hear Me Out – by Monty

  1. You are a genius, M. I am stunned that you did all that math right in your little head! I’m sure Chicken will be on board with this idea. I mean – what’s not to like….?

    Love and licks,

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you for acknowledging my genius, but my head isn’t little. I’ve lost count of the times I’ve been told I have a big head. Big Head Monty – that’s what they call me. 😃
      Monty 🐾


  2. You can surf the web Monty and find plenty of evidence that fast hounds like ourselves cannot sustain our athletic performance with gravel feed full of grains. We need plenty of meat in our diet and very little or no grains. Show your hoomans the way and you will not have to wait until Chicken needs the vets again :o)

    Liked by 1 person

    • You’re right. The gravel we are being given is grain-free luckily, but it is also taste-free. Boring! ☹️ I intend to use all my skills to guide her back to meat and fish, but I think I’ll have to put in some serious effort. But I love a challenge!
      Monty 🐾

      Liked by 1 person

      • You can shop around Monty. Nature’s Menu pouches for instance are full of food you would love and when you get them on amazon subscribe & save you save a fortune. When you alternate the really good stuff with ordinary food you still get plenty of goodness without breaking the bank 😎🍗

        Liked by 1 person

      • Thank you. I’ll have a look at it. I may decide to put it onto my list of approved foods. 😃😃

        Liked by 1 person

  3. Monty – mum is just writing down my list of party food. Two pages in her notebook so far……fabulous!!! I am a bit of a picky eater as I get older – and get mum to tempt me with all sorts of loveliness……nudge nudge, wink wink……xxx

    Liked by 1 person

    • URGENT: Foster home required as soon as possible for two black greyhounds, one and a half of which are house trained. Excellent with party food. Please collect us today.
      Monty and Chicken 🐾


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