The first night of living our new nocturnal lifestyle has ended in carnage.
We began the evening with high hopes and a spate of congratulatory statements about our excellent plan. Not long into the experiment however, the heavens conspired against us and a wealth of thunder, lightning and heavy rain descended.
After one unnecessarily loud clap of thunder, I made my way carefully though purposefully towards my office where I had left some important paperwork which needed attending to. On the way there, I caught the wire of the fan and dragged it three foot along the carpet. In an effort to get out of the way, I tripped on the vacuum cleaner (why is it even there; it’s never used) and banged into a set of step ladders which came down with enough noise to drown out the thunder.
At this point I decided to abandon my foray into nocturnal living and went into the hallway for some peace and quiet and perchance to sleep.
When I awoke this morning I found that we have a new Prime Minister in the shape and form of Boris Johnson.
It is entirely possible that I have concussion.