Chicken

145. In Support Of Monty – by Chicken

Posted on September 9, 2016 by Mydogslife

Because Monty bum bum is not allowed to go walking, he is getting all grumpy and mad annoyed. I did say that he did have to takes it easy so I did try to takes it easy with him to helps him.

I did trying for a long time and then it was very too difficult to takes it easy, so I did jumpy jumps and did go for walks. But in between jumpy jumps and walkings, I did takes it easy with my Monty.

Monty did say thank you, but he did then also say that I wasn’t all allowed to leave the house with my slippers on, and that I definitely wasn’t all allowed to go to the supermarket in them. Bum.

image

All taking it easy

Categories: Chicken, Greyhounds | Tags:

143. NHS Delivers Outstanding Care To Ailing Greyhound – by Chicken

Posted on September 6, 2016 by Mydogslife
image

Poorly foot Monty 

I has founded the National Hound Service to looks after poorly Monty. He did go to the vets and she did say that he had arthritis in his left wrist. She did give him some big medicine and did say he had to rest properly and then I did also say that he had to rest and that I would all look after him.

The Fairy did go to the shoppy shop and did buy me two presents because Monty donty is poorly. She did give me my first present and I did love it because it did squeak. Then on accident she did give Monty my other second present and it was a soft squirrel and it did make a different squeaky noise. I did take it off Monty because I did not all want him to hurt his hurty foot because I does love him.

Then I did tell Monty that I will tell him all about the walking when I go out because he is not allowed to come. Monty did say he was working in his office anyways, so I did say I would help him and he did say no.

Arky and The Fairy did say they does have a plan to help Monty to rest so Monty is all being looked after properly.

Chicken xxx

Categories: Chicken, Greyhounds | Tags:

140. Press Release 1 – by Chicken

Posted on August 30, 2016 by Mydogslife

SECRET ORGAN EYE STATION ORGAN EYED IN SECRET

Monty McDonty and Ugly Face Cats has all made a secret organ eye station called The Neighbours Hooded Wildlife Animal Watch. They did do it all in a secret at my house in secret. I is the most importance because I does have to deal with all the peoples and all the wildlife and all the press.

We is going to do plans tonights in the night time and the fox does have to look out and then Monty did not share the roll sausage in a bag. Bum.

It is all secret so nobody is allowed to know what is happening tonight when the wildlife with the hoods is coming to my house to do plans. The end.

By Stand-Still-Chicken 

Public Relations Officer

The Hooded Neighbours Wildlife Fox Animal Watch Hood

Categories: Chicken, Greyhounds | Tags: , , , ,

137. Hotty Botty Scary Day – by Chicken

Posted on August 25, 2016 by Mydogslife
image

Wet tea-towel competition 

In the last few big days it has been hotty botty hot hot. We did sit near Monty’s fans and do the drinking a lot. Then The Fairy was bored so decidered to dress us up, but she did forget to dry the clothes first so they was all wet and cold. Monty did say he was all happy to wear posh costume-made coats, but wasn’t going to put up with being made to wear a tatty old wet tea-towel. Then he did go into his den under the big table and take it offs, so I did take mine offs as well.

Very early I did see Ugly Cats on the fence so I did go to tells him off. He did say that he had been out all night and it was still too warm for him. Then he did say that he needed to speak to big Monty about a scary key. I did say that Monty wouldn’t all speak to anyone who had been out on the tiles all night, and that he was in his den anyways.

Ugly Cats did say he had not been out having fun on the tiles, but that he had been out doing scary key work. I did tell him he was not allowed to talk to my Monty about scary things because then Monty does get scared.

image

I don’t care if it’s good for me; I’m not wearing THAT

Then big Arky did comes out and stupid Ugly Cats did turn all fluffy and soft and stupid cutie-pie with his face. Arky did tickle him behind his ears and Ugly Cats did make stupid purry noises. I did tell Arky that I did need my ears rubbing but he didn’t hear me, so I did go to tell Monty.

Monty did say he would ask The Fairy when he got up, but he did have a sneaky suspicion that Arky was a cat person.

Then I did think abouts this and then I dids look at Arky and then I dids think he does have a lots of hair and then I dids think he might turn into cats! So I did use the iPaddy and did finds out that some people are half people and half wolf and then I dids go to gets into Monty’s den.

Chicken xxx

Categories: Chicken, Greyhounds | Tags: , ,

136. The Limpets Marathon – by Chicken

Posted on August 22, 2016 by Mydogslife

On the tellybox in the week ago, we did see the big race at the Limpets. Everybody did miss the bus so they all did have to run 26 miles to get to the finish line. Monty did say this was supposed to happen, and it was called the marathon. Then he did all gibber on about the history of the race and he did talking about a place and a battle and I did go to look for hedgehogs in the garden.

image

Starting the marathon 

Then The Fairy did decide to do a marathon but not the running bit, because she is not as fitty fit fit as me and Monty. Arky did come with his camera and when we got there we did have to stop to look at nothing for ages. I was bored. Then we did see big ugly fluffy things with skinny greyhound legs who was all staring at us meanly, but me and Monty did ignoring because they wasn’t proper greyhounds. Monty did say they were sheep and I did say they were smelly.

image

What view?

We did walkering for big ages and we did all start to slow down. There was loads of too much wind near the end so we did want to get back in the safety car. When we did get home we had yummy yummy food because it was biggerer dinner day, and then me and Monty did fall asleep and do big sleeping because we had all done the Limpets marathon.

Then after this later I did want to go for another walks because I is higher active and The Fairy did say I was like a rechargeable batteries, but I did say I just wanted to go for another walks. Monty was all tired so he did pretending to be asleep so I did help him wake up by kicking him. Then he did get up and come with us.

Chicken xxx

Categories: Chicken, Greyhounds | Tags: ,

133. Monty’s In The Dog House – by Chicken

Posted on August 11, 2016 by Mydogslife
image

In the dog house

My beautiful Monty big bum is in the dog house. He has all done the big weeing in the pit and I did win the digging competition and I is not going back in the pit.

We did do some more Limpets this morning, and Monty donty did win three useless sports medals.

First he did win the getting up first in the morning competition (5.01am).

Then he did get an extra medal for winning the waking up The Fairy for no good reason at 5.01am as well, when I didn’t even want to go out anyway because it’s raining cat gory (5.01am).

Then he did win the how many times can we get The Fairy to open the slidy door before 6am for no good reason because I didn’t want to go out anyway because it’s raining section (4).

Today we was all going to do the aqueducts, but it is rainy rain outside so Monty did say we hads to wait because he didn’t want to gets wet. I is looking forward to this bit, because I does love the water and I will win all the swimming competitions in my paddling pool. I have warned Monty that I will know what he’s done ifs the water turns green.

Monty did say that he was having a break from doing the Limpets because he all did have to finish the engine near me project with Arky, but I does think he is sulking because he didn’t win the digging. I am doing secret, secret training when he is not looking. BOOM! BOOM!

Chicken xxx

 

Categories: Chicken, Greyhounds | Tags: , , ,

130. Honeymoon Woods – by Chicken

Posted on August 9, 2016 by Mydogslife
image

Talkering about getting married, and going in the digging pit

We did go for a walk in the lovely woods and it was all big and pretty. We had not been before, so it was all exciting. Then Monty did say that ifs he was going to have a holiday, he would like it to be in this woods.

So I did do thinking, and then said that we could come to the woods when we gets married, and have a holiday honeymoon here. Monty did think this was a goody idea, and then we did talk and talk and talk about getting married.

Then Monty did say we was having a Limpets competition, and we did do the jumping competition, and I did win. Then Monty did say that he had won, which all wasn’t true. I did tell him that he had put his foot down but he did say he hadn’t and then I did say that he had and then he did say that he hadn’t and then I was cross.

Monty did say that we was all having more Limpet competitions again the next time, so I did say we could have a digging competition which is in the digging pit. Monty did say the venue is immaterial, and we could all have the digging competition but that he would do his digging in a different other place. Then I did say NO! The digging competition is in the digging pit and ifs he doesn’t do it inside the digging pit, he will lose.

So I win.

Chicken xxx

Categories: Chicken, Greyhounds | Tags: ,

128. The Oil Limpets – by Chicken

Posted on August 7, 2016 by Mydogslife

Monty donty has all taken the remoty control for the tellybox, because he did say that he needed to watch the oil limpets. He did say everyone in the whole big world is watchering the oil limpets, so I did say everyone in the whole big world would be bored silly because oil limpets doesn’t even move a lot ever.

image

The oil limpets

Monty told me that I was all wrong, and the limpets were very exciting on the tellybox. I did say if the limpets really is so exciting, why doesn’t he go to the big ocean and see the real things? He did say that he didn’t wants to fly that far. I did all not know that big Monty could do the flying, so now I does love him even more.

I did decide to tell Ugly Cats that Monty could fly, but then I did the thinking and did realise that Ugly Cats does not come to see me anymore. Then I was sad. Monty did tell me nots to worry, because cats does sometimes disappear for a few bits of times, and then they does come backs again. But he did also say that maybe Ugly Cats was staying away because he was fed up with me being rude to him.

So I did say that I would all be nicer and kindly friendly to Ugly Cats when he does the coming back. Monty did then gibber on about pigs flying, and I did say watching pigs flying was more interesting than watching limpets doing not much moving, so I did go out into the garden to wait for Ugly Cats and the flying piggies.

Chicken xxx

Categories: Chicken, Greyhounds | Tags:

127. It’s The Pits – by Chicken

Posted on August 6, 2016 by Mydogslife

My bestest birthday present is the sloth pit which is called the digging pit. Monty is all too scaredy to go in it, so it is all for me and not for him. We also did get a new other present which is a fire pit which we is not allowed to play with or go near in case it gets us, but it is still my present.

I did do the demonstrating of the digging, but then I did hurt myself with the ball. The Fairy and Arky did give me kisses and then it was all better, so everything is OK.

Monty did do his own demonstrating about being banned from going near our fire pit present. He is so good at “registering my  level of discontent with the standard of presents on offer.” 

Chicken xxx

Categories: Chicken, Greyhounds | Tags: ,

125. Hippo Birdy To Us – by Chicken

Posted on August 3, 2016 by Mydogslife
image

Going out in my car on our birthmonth 

Not before a long time ago a few days ago, I did have a big birthday to say I was eight years old and more older than Monty.  Then all of a suddenly, Monty’s birthday did happen and he is also eight now but he is still youngerer than me, so I win.

I does have a proper birthday but Monty says his is a secret secret, so he just says he is born on the August first day. He did say that racing greyhounds sometimes just has a month as a birthday and not always a special day date. So then I did say we can have a birthmonth insteads of a birthday, and then we can all have 31 presents and not just one. Monty did say this was a goody idea, and my birthmonth is July and his birthmonth is August so office alley we should all get 62 presents altogether.

Our big present is the sloth pit which is called a digging pit. I does go in it and then Monty doesn’t go in it because he is scaredy pants. I does big digging all the time and I loves it. It did take a long time to build it and put sand in it and now the sand is all mixed up with the mud and it is all getting deeper.

Monty did say that he was going to make a list of the other 61 presents that he wants, so I did say this was a goody best idea and I would all do the same.

MONTY’s LIST

A new lead; a chemistry set; 59 rump steaks.

MY LIST

Two new leads; two chemical sets; 118 rumpy steaks; a real life fluffy bunny rabbit which I will look after and play with but not eat it; a bikini for my holidays; a full bag of rotty rotten fish heads to throw at Ugly Cats; some roller blades; 26 roll sausages in a bag which I is not sharing with Monty; driving lessons.

My list is betterer than his list.

Chicken xxx

Categories: Chicken, Greyhounds | Tags: ,

Blog at WordPress.com.